“Many excellent and committed Rules Players I meet start out following every Rule. When you’re first setting out, this is a sensible approach. After all, the alternative is complacency and an assurance that “I can do this stuff,” which certainly isn’t true.

None of us finds every situation effortless. It may be clear what we should do, but that doesn’t always mean it’s easy. And sometimes we’re not sure which way to go. So, by all means start out taking each Rule seriously.

Tha is the general idea. However, as you become more comfortable and self-assured as a Rules Player and begin to develop sound instincts for Rules behavior, you can begin to loosen up. Many of the Rules will become automatic, and you’ll no longer have to think about them. And once you reach this stage, you’ll find that occasionally one of the Rules really isn’t quite appropriate.

It’s no good persuading yourself a Rule doesn’t fit because you’d much rather not have to follow it. You need to be clear and objective. But when your instincts genuninely tell you to break a Rule, then go for it.

Personally, I find that there’s rarely a need to break a Rule. I do break Rules occasionally. For example, a Rules Player never deliberately belittles other people in public, but about twice in my life I’ve encountered people who really needed to be belittled in public to stop them from doing it to others.

In the end it’s about gut feeling. Follow the Rules until they’re so ingrained they become instinct, and then trust your instincts. If you refer back to the Rules from time to time, and you work on the ones you find tricky, you can be confident that in time your instincts will serve you better than any book.”

Language: English
Format: PDF
Pages: 273
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